Dirty looks, offensive and abusive comments, unfair treatment and a massive inferiority complex are just some of the things that I really struggled to live with as an overweight child....

Deep down I knew that I was beautiful, but when you are told otherwise, you begin to believe it. I hid my inner beauty, even from myself, reminding myself, as others had readily done, that I was a stupid idiot for even thinking for a second that I deserved to feel good about myself. I was, after all, just a fat person. I really started to believe the negative self talk. I really thought that it was true that people who are thin are better. That was what I was told, in the media, from my family who didn’t know any better, from strangers on the street as they screamed expletives at me for no other reason than that I was overweight. Plus sized children needed to be changed as far as ‘they’ were concerned, and that sent me the message that I was bad and wrong for simply being me. Now I’m not saying that my family did not have a right to be concerned for my health, because as we have all become aware, the risk factor for weight related health issues is greatly increased and should be considered as a possible reality. What my main objection was about was that I was always the same person, and always deserved to be loved and respected for who I was, rather than what my size was. It would be a long road ahead before I realised that I am not my weight, and I am not my looks. I am greater than all of that. But how can you not believe that you are worth less than thin people, when it was virtually impossible to find clothing to suit your shape, and even harder to find clothing to suit your personality. Was that the problem within the fashion industry? Did they assume that ‘larger sized women’ didn’t have a personality? If this was the case, I take great offence at that. Or perhaps the powers that be didn’t think there was a market in plus sized clothing. Or perhaps they didn’t want to send out the message that being overweight was ok. Whatever the reason, we the public, were left with less than suitable fashion options. But the great thing about life is that if you don’t like something, you have the power to change it. It was going to be many years before I discovered this for myself, and even longer before I had the opportunity to put it into action. I had been on every diet in the world, trying to change myself to what society viewed was the right shape. An uphill battle. Self hatred, self loathing, anger at those around me, regret over not having been brought up in the ‘right family’. I had all the thoughts that would keep me exactly where I was. Stuck. In between where I was, and where I wanted to be. And still I was dressing in over priced, boring grandma clothes that did not suit me. I remember walking in to Target once as a teenager, swaggering over to the plus sized clothing area, and being greeted with a sea of fluorescent. ‘Fluorescent!’ I shouted! Why would I want to stand out like a stick of zinc?! Don’t they know I want to hide? ‘Where’s the black? Give me black!’ I once over heard someone ask their friend ‘why don’t plus sized women wear clothes that fit them properly?’ I thought about that for awhile, and concluded it was for 2 reasons. 1. We didn’t like our bodies, so we tried to hide them behind loose fitting clothes, hoping that people wouldn’t notice us and our ‘not so feminine’ curves, or that 2. The clothes we bought just weren’t right for us, and there were so little options for the ‘fuller figured’ woman that we were prepared to settle on whatever we could get. But times, they are a changin’! Currently, up to 60% of women in Australia are considered ‘plus sized’ with body shapes ranging from size 12 upwards. Size 12. Since when was size 12 considered plus size? Well we have the fashion and modeling industries to thank for that. I would have loved to be a skinny size 12 when I was younger and was sized 24-26, so when I found out that 12 was the new plus size, I was not impressed. I can understand the frustration amongst women sized 12 and above, who would really object to being considered overweight, especially if they were in the ‘healthy weight range.’ But unfortunately, once a term is coined, it’s not going to go away in a hurry. The silly thing is that I would say I know more about how to lose weight, and more about health and exercise, than most thin people I know. Why then was I still overweight? Obviously there were other factors involved. It takes work, focus, commitment, and internal happiness to lose weight, and something else all together to keep it off. I have lost around a hundred kilos at different intervals in my life, thanks to my perpetual dieting. Something just wasn’t right though if I kept putting it back on. Why would I do that to myself? ..... To read the rest of this article please click here and then on the 'About Us' section of our website: www.plussizedclothing.com.au By Sharona Radovsky - Director Of Work Rest And Play Plus Sized Clothing